Careful conversation is communication
IN THE corporate world, a word that is tossed around very freely is `communication' and how one individual is so good at it while another is not. One person might say things in an amicable manner. Another might always put his foot in his mouth when he opens it and when he is least prepared for it!
Communication, as we all know, implies an exchange of thoughts and ideas. Conversation is the best tool for this. It is casual and can be used at any time. There are no written notes or minutes, and yet many a deal takes place on the basis of conversation. Many promises are made and fulfilled through deft conversations. On a larger scale, many a career has been made or destroyed.
Most conversations tend to drift along while one idea stems from another and ultimately you realise that you have not really learnt anything new after you had a stimulating conversation. This would be acceptable in a social milieu but in the office and as a manager, one needs to give direction to and be able to control a conversation.
This means that you need to:
Make sure your message has been understood
Understand what has been said to you
Be able to exert control over the way the conversation is flowing
Avoid ambiguity:
There is a very cute story about an old lady who said that her flight was okay till the captain asked them to buckle up their seat belts because there was too much of `flatulence'. Obviously she meant `turbulence' which the captain was referring to. Such mistakes happen all the time unless we listen carefully .The speaker and the listener should avoid ambiguity.
This is possible if:
One can very simply repeat what he has heard to rule out any possible mistake---you play back for confirmation
Write down all that you have heard or at least the gist. Read your notes to
ensure that your gist matches what the speaker said
When you are confirming the facts, provide examples of other similar data
which broadens the base and the context for instance, "... . like we did in 2004 when we had the problem with the ... "
Seeking Information:
Your supervisor is seeking information about a tardy colleague who also happens to be your buddy. You do not want to let your buddy down. Yet the first probing question: "Tell me what you think about D----.He is your friend, isn't he?" catches you unawares and you open your mouth and spill the beans— yes, "he has not been doing his tasks" or "he has been sluggish, he has a lot on his mind" and the like.
The open ended question is a handy tool because it passes over the speaker's role to another and the questioner can sit back, watch and listen carefully while information spills out. These questions begin with the standard what, when, why, where and how. Get your references in place and begin your questions with one of the above cues. If you seek information with any other opening sentences, you will probably get one-line answers only.
Difficult situation:
In the corporate world many situations warrant a cool head and clear thinking. In every department there will always be those moments when somebody makes a grave mistake and has to be corrected.
Sometimes, there are people who are on a perpetual short fuse and willing to battle the whole world. In such situations, you need to be calm and dignified. It does not pay to lose your cool or humiliate others.
If you need to discipline someone, always assume that you have misunderstood the situation and therefore ask questions to reaffirm the facts.
Generally, we begin by believing the worst about a person---if you begin by the old legal proviso, which says `innocent till proved guilty' you might save yourself some embarrassment.
SHYAMOLA KHANNA
faqs@cnkonline.com
Printer friendly
page
Send this article to Friends by
E-Mail
Opportunities
