She gropes in the dark, literally

By K. V. S. Madhav

HYDERABAD, JULY 1. A restless eye and a glazed look wander across the ramshackle room. Her shining eyes are filled with dreams, more than what they can behold.

She yearns for a house of her own filled with fragrant flowers, loves to go on a drive in a car with the wind in the hair, and also walk around in stilettoes! A typical teenager with simple dreams?

Yes and no. She is a normal girl, but with a ghastly past. She is blind, rather "made to be blind." She was just two years old when an "extremely callous doctor" wrongly removed her healthy right eye when he actually was supposed to operate on her malignant left eye on that fateful day of February 22, 1980.

"I have no images in my mind. Not even the faintest ones. I have no idea how it feels to see," says 22-year old Nasreen Banu, two decades after the infamous operation at the Sarojini Devi Eye Hospital that rocked the collective conscience of the entire nation.

Tired of sitting at home listening to the rain spluttering on the tarpaulin roof in Erragadda, Nasreen hangs on in quiet desperation. Haunted by the trauma at such a young age, she struggles to come to terms with life.

And she has. She can cook on her own, picking up the ingredients from the shelf. She surfs channels, never misses a serial and remembers the timings correctly. She loves films and can recognise filmstars by their voices. Even newsreaders, as she keeps herself abreast of what's happening around, regularly `watching' news bulletins. Then, she's an ardent cricket buff too like millions.

"I really wanted to study, but alas, never had the opportunity. I never aspired to become a doctor or an engineer, I just wanted to study," she says. Her mother, Mehmooda Begum, chips in, "she has so many dreams. At times she mocks at our poverty and says that she should have been left behind in America." Nasreen intervenes, "I was just joking. Apna India koyi chodke jayega kya?"

Nasreen as a toddler was sent to the United States for treatment to prevent total blindness. "She didn't get anything from the Government except an ex-gratia of Rs.10,000 which was inordinately delayed, and the cost for treatment in US but it was a futile exercise," her mother recalls. Nasreen's cancerous left eye was also removed on April 14, 1980, at a New York hospital.

The family filed a suit for damages against the State Government, Superintendent, Sarojini Devi Hospital, Dr. Dayanand Reddy, the doctor who performed the operation, and Director, Medical Services, for a Rs.10 lakh compensation way back on February 9, 1981.

The litigation spanned a lifetime, literally. Her father, Bahadur Khan, machine operator in the erstwhile Allwyn Metal Works, whose only dream was to bring justice to his daughter, died fighting the case in 1993. The lawyer too died.

Her family members gave up the case owing to poor finances. "Khane ko mushkil hora, ab case kahan se ladhe hum," her sister, Yasmeen, says. Thus, the case was given a silent burial. "My husband's entire life revolved around her. His only dream was to see her back with sight," Mehmooda Begum recalls wistfully.

Nasreen's three brothers drive auto trolleys. Life's a hand-to- mouth existence despite the occasional philanthropic support.

"I can't live forever. My only dream is to get her married. But, bridegrooms are so demanding these days. They ask lakhs of rupees in dowry. Its so difficult to get even a normal girl married and my daughter is no normal girl," she says.

A recent visit to a premier eye hospital in the city reinforced the fact that she can never see again. Dejected, but resolute, Nasreen says with a smile, "I want to see the Haji Mastan Dargah in Mumbai by the seaside."

What will she ask God? "I'll ask him why he had to give me a life like this if at all he wanted me to live", pat comes the reply, the smile fading away. There is only bitterness in her choked voice as she fights back tears.

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