Get the shine back on the apple! Treat seats and other frights

A Fright

The other day I dropped in to see a friend of mine who had just returned from Hong Kong. He owns his own business that is into providing content for portals and the media. Almost all his 125 employees are what are loosely called `knowledge workers.

They are good bunch, generally jolly and there is always a happy buzz humming through the air as I make my way to the boss' room.

Today there were a few desultory smiles, rather more business- like nods, and none of the usual flirtatious winks from my friend's many lady executives. Odd, I thought, since fun was the byword in that office. I entered my friend's room and found him with a 20-litre polycarbonate bottle of mineral water on his table attempting to do it devilish injury.

He was inserting, yes inserting some well-grown tropical fish into the bottle. Known for his eccentricity, I would have thought nothing of it, but this was too much, I felt, even for him! I noticed that were some large goldfish, a couple of fiery red Siamese fighting fish and a Malay loach. Without instantly calling for an ambulance, I asked him what he was up to. His answer was a masterstroke of HR best practice! g The guys in the office were all slowing down and getting listless so I thought I'd liven them up a little, ergo, these little fish in the water they drink will give them something to think about!h He had fetched with him, remarkably life-like plastic fish that `swam' in the water every time the water was agitated.

At lunchtime we struggled across the deserted work floor and upturned the bottle onto the cooler stand and the `fish' quivered in reply. When the first employees returned it wasn't long before they made their way to the water cooler. The effect was hilarious!

A shout of fright changed to a bellow of laughter, others who came in were treated to the same spectacle, with the same effect.

With this simple action, my friend converted a dull and listless office into a vibrant, joyful place thrumming with delighted productivity. He brought life back to the flagging spirits in his office.

Everywhere, things are `just going on'. More accurately, they are creaking along, with employees and employers alike coming to office because its better than staying at home, or perhaps because its better to be working than unemployed. They are in it for the packet that they collect on the last working day of the month.

This attitude ensures only one thing. A drop in productivity and certainly a squeeze on innovation and creativity.

Bucking up the bad economy

One fallout of the recession is workplace depression. This mind- and spirit-sapping situation needs to be addressed and addressed innovatively. Show people that they can come to work and enjoy the process!

Some companies resort to `communication meetings' where tired CEOs or juiced-out CFOs amble in to tell the troops the state of affairs, often the promise of a better, brighter tomorrow. The employees shuffle in, no one is truly enthusiastic and everyone is tired. The front rows in our culture are generally the last to be taken and they remain woefully vacant. Now imagine the first few words of the CEO when he says: gI would like you all to look at the envelope taped to the bottom of your chairsh The flurry of excitement will be palpable.

Imagine now that each envelope contains two tickets to a popular movie running in town! The mood will be bordering on the ecstatic. Now when the CEO begins to tell them about the state of affairs, people will pay attention, and they will be receptive.

All because they feel that the management cares. Now all the CEO has to do is to march up to the empty seats in front and say, gI wonder what those of you who could have sat in the front row would have got?h Then reach down under them and pull out an envelope containing two coupons entitling the holders to a five- star meal! Any organisation will be assured of 100% occupancy of the front rows in such future meetings! The secret here is not to repeat the treat-seat so as to enhance expectation.

There are countless ways to reward people inexpensively. One organisation arranged a scuba-diving weekend in Goa, where all the expenditure the employee had to undertake was to pay for his journey there and back.

The thrill rippled through the office for months as this treat was a unique experience. This was expensive, but those were the times of plenty. In these, leaner times, companies are cutting costs, so what do they do to give outstanding performance the recognition it deserves?

Simple! Print personalised stationery with apocryphal designations like `Kamalakar Sachin Rao Official King of Outbound Training and Callisthenics - by order, The Management'. Its funny, quirky and its official as the CEO or the HR Honcho makes this presentation publicly.

I know of a company who had had an outbound training exercise. This was in better times. This year, they called a team of professional rock climbers and abseiled their whole office down the side of their six-storey building!

This was prefaced by a talk by the CEO on cost cutting, he instructed his employees that the lift services would be suspended and that the steps were cancelled. Then he strode out and shimmied down the side of the building! Everybody followed, one after the other, and had a whale of a time, much to the wonder and envy of neighbouring offices who watched them in amazement! The atmosphere in that office? Upbeat and dynamic! Cost? Rs15/- for the four professionals who stayed on to have tea!

Endspeak

You don't need to spend a bomb on making the workplace fun, but it pays terrific dividends to the company that improves the enthusiasm of its people and injects their work with creativity and innovation. People who are happy won't run after the lure of more money and will turn down head-hunters when they swoop down. Moreover people will enjoy working with each other more when they have fun with each other, encourage each other and help each other!

ABHIMANYU ACHARYA

abhi.hyd@cnkonline.com