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They call the shots
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Unlike those days, domestic help is hard to come by, let alone finding a reliable one. They are no longer subservient or self-effacing. SABITA RADHAKRISHNA surveys the scene.
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TWO OR three generations ago, as legacies of the British Raj, we had slaves not servants. People who worked the skin off their backs for a paltry sum, who stood before you with folded hands to do your bidding... on whom you could vent your anger with a verbal whiplash or a beating and sack at will. They worked willingly from dawn to dusk without any thought of recompense for their unstinting devotion. And they stayed on because they knew no better.
It is heartening times have changed for them and they have the right to choose... Going back in time, one can see "maids to order." Cooking delicious food and in the process, grinding dosai maavu on the stone, and masalas on the ammi kal to a satin like consistency, undaunted by the prospect of parties, washing dishes, managing the daily marketing, ironing clothes, babysitting on demand, and finishing a hundred odd chores, all for the measly sum of Rs. 25 a month! Indeed a vanishing tribe! The days of being "accommodating" are long since over. Timings and duties are fixed and woe betide you if you want to squeeze in an extra bit of dusting or plan to clean the fans or remove cobwebs from the place. Divest your home of brass artefacts or allow them to absorb the salt air to get the antique look. Today, a woman who does the "top work" in some of the posh localities in Chennai in a three-bedroom apartment expects Rs. 800-1,000 depending upon the number of hours she works. She works in about three houses and at an average earns about Rs. 2,500 a month. Good cooks are rare to find, demanding at least Rs. 1,500 a month as starting salary.
The maids have become prima donnas and the roles are reversed for it is they who interview you now — How many family members? How many rooms? Do you have a washing machine? Does one have to walk up all the way to the terrace? It is mandatory that you have a mixer and a wet grinder and a TV. With most of the road widening projects in full swing, some of the families have had to be uprooted. Bus fare is part of the package. The maids group themselves area-wise and hire an auto, which means you pay Rs. 5 each way, say from Neelangarai to Adyar. A neighbour's maid cycles to work. Not before an advance for this vehicle was extracted.
Krishna mentions that his cook of 35 years now drives his car to work. Though he (the cook) is comfortably well off now as an estate agent, old habits diehard and he can never forget the family, which sheltered him these long years. Moreover, he enjoys cooking for them, and how else can he save time but by commuting by car!
In conservative Chennai, the maids dress to kill. Apart from the kajal, dangling earrings, decorative bottus and long strings of jasmine, which leave a trail, they wear polyester saris and mostly salwar suits "very convenient to work in." Eyebrows are tweezed and nails painted. Shamini chats up an impeccably dressed lady in the building who clutches a Mills and Boon novel. Realisation dawns slowly, that she is the maid and not the mistress. Shamini, very casually attired, flees the scene suspecting that the "lady" thinks she is talking to a fellow maid! The sooner we accept the fact that these workers have sensibilities like any of us, with minds of their own, and are no longer subservient or self effacing we would be less frustrated. You cannot talk to them patronisingly or find fault at every turn. Nor can you let off steam by yelling at them for jobs undone. You have to mind your (body) language and nuances of facial expressions. Otherwise, you risk a torrent of protests and an ultimate walkout. And if your knowledge of the local language is not good, don't try to preach or you might end up saying the wrong things with fearsome connotations.
Those who have worked with the underprivileged on a one-to-one basis treat these people with more compassion. It is because of the great divide of class and money that they cannot speak their minds or express their feelings without sounding cheeky. Though due respect should be shown to the employees, one cannot take for granted unquestioning obedience. High expectations of efficiency and a patronising attitude just drive them away. Otherwise how else would you account for the fact that some people retain their domestic help for years while others have a high turn over? Lakshmi, who has worked with the deprived class, is well acquainted with their problems. In her home, the girl who works for them joins them for a meal at their table, uses their toilets and her name is on the nameplate outside their home! It might be stretching the point but it shows that the tide has turned in favour of this section of society.
Evolving is part of progress through awareness and literacy, and it is a good thing for our country. Don't have a mind-set or great expectations from your maids... be firm right from the beginning about salaries and what exactly you would expect from them. Don't leave anything cloaked in ambiguity, list out everything. If you are giving them food, don't ration out impossibly small quantities! Don't for a minute labour under the delusion that by giving them old clothes, sheets, milk sachets, old newspapers and leftover food that you are being generous, remember you are giving them only what you don' t want or do not have use for. Don't expect any returns out of your generosity or liberal dealings.
Don't leave temptations in full sight, like cash, cupboard keys, or pieces of jewellery. At their level, it is a question of survival; ethics and loyalty do not come into the picture. Don't get into the rut of advances, and be clear about this right from the start. Tackle all aspects of housework, from cooking and cleaning to the washing of dishes and ironing! Equip yourself for an emergency, which happens ever so often.
Today, there are many reliable agencies that offer trained maids in housework and cooking. The charges are about Rs. 1,000 per month for a "top worker" and Rs. 1,500 for a cook, but you have to be prepared to grant leave once a month, besides a payment to the agency. It may sound expensive but at least, reliability is vouched for to some extent, and some agencies even give a police clearance. This is important today with all the murders and looting that go on, most of which are linked to the people working in the home. Seek scholarship possibilities for the children, or pay medical insurance for them. Help them with immediate medical attention whenever needed. Teach your children to respect them as individuals and not boss them around. And train the kids to be independent, for they will ultimately live in a society sans domestic help.
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Metro Plus
Bangalore
Chennai
Delhi
Hyderabad
Kochi
Thiruvananthapuram
Visakhapatnam
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