Date:13/06/2006 URL: http://www.thehindu.com/2006/06/13/stories/2006061303350200.htm

Karnataka - Bangalore

Only quality time together can make a marriage work

Special Correspondent

Expensive gifts cannot make up for real togetherness

Spending time together is becoming increasingly difficult for working couples
Therefore, they must make an effort to keep time apart for themselves

Showing genuine interest in what your partner likes helps

Bangalore: Many young working couples have to make do with gifting each other expensive things. There is often not enough time to go out for dinner, a movie or, perhaps, a sports event.

"Spending quality time together is becoming more difficult for working couples, especially those in the tech sectors. Long working hours and equally long commutes leave them exhausted at the end of the day. That is where the importance of spending time together in `couple activities,' like watching a sports event together, can make all the difference," says psychotherapist Sunanda Murthy.

Studies have shown that lack of enough time together and lack of open communication are the main hurdles to a happy married life, she points out. While the initial days of euphoric romance may not come back, the spark can be kept alive to be kindled when the occasion comes.

While there is nothing wrong with expensive gifts that many couple can afford today, gifts cannot make up for real togetherness. "If suddenly asked, many young wives or husbands cannot readily answer if their spouse has black or brown eyes or when they last spent a whole day together. Going out to parties does not count as time together because they spend more time with other guests," she says.